Who will be the stand-out rookie on the Packers roster this year?
Curious in Clintonville
Dear CIC,
The GBROTY will be James Jones. In the No. 3 receiver slot he will catch 55+ balls, successfully complete a pass on a trick play (he was a QB in high school), and also run back 2 kickoffs for touchdowns. After his first runback, the Lambeau Field PA announcer will play "Mr. Jones" by the Counting Crows in the hopes of further pumping up the crowd. Exactly the opposite will happen. In Week 11, in the fourth quarter of a game against Detroit, a Fox cameraman will zoom in on a homemade sign that reads "GB Drinks the Kool-Aid for James Jones" which will prompt Kenny Albert to make a painfully awkward and misguided analogy between mass suicide and the Lions' defensive play in the second half. Also, in an effort to fully live up to his label as the next Sterling Sharpe, Mr. Jones will try to sleep with as many West DePere high school girls as possible.
2. Dear The Fontenot,
When the season is over, how will the Packers rank in terms of total offense and total defense?
Lyle from Little Suamico
Dear LFLS,
This member of The Fontenot is going to predict that the defense will be 11th in the league and the offense will be 15th in the league. This is based on one pre-season game, last year's performances, and a dream I had during a nap in which the Packers went 8-8 again despite above-average stats. Or maybe it was 9-7 and a wildcard berth. If I'm wrong, I will eat my hat, provided the hat is delicious.
3. Dear The Fontenot,
Who will be the Packers starting kicker come the season opener?
Greg in Appleton

Recent Comments