The Fontenot

Mid-Week Super-Cryptic NFL Wrapup: Week 3

This week in the NFL, thirty-eight plus thirty-eight plus thirty-eight all over three equalled thirty-eight.  The booty was no longer allowed to get in the way.  Strange colored men from another realm annihilated the kings of the jungle.  Without much of anything the people-eaters were undone, and the Fart Prince quarterback failed for the last time.  Something with an oily sheen--mediocre--will take his place.

Old-man running back went down again, only this time he has more money.  Snake-eyes came up for the deuce.  Race-based critiques fell to pieces in the wake of white lightning's flash, and 420, for once, was not obnoxious.  Coverboy got benched for the haggard, fallen star, and it turned out to work, kinda.  Someone made someone melt down, and all of it was surprisingly boring.

All across the NFL, MCLs gots messy.  The chunk running back returned with the tall angry cowboy to smite the superstar nemesis together.  Now down south, they don't believe quite so much.  In the mountains, they realized they might suck.

Mid-Week Super-Cryptic NFL Wrapup: Week 2

This week in the NFL, the Juice is not loose. Average teams scored billions, and this time, the joke did not go wrong. A cheap word got cheapened more by a befuddled man in Motown. Running back buddies did nothing together but their friendship and video game date is intact. Points got scored and plays got made on 4^th and short. The FDNY got walloped. In the process a car salesman lost his place.

To the west, a kicker again came through, and to the east, the River didn’t run, though a few times he threw it. His joystick buddy tried and failed. A coach wept through a game, thinking of his money.  The shaved head didn’t end up helping. No videos were made.

A refurbished Tank will go out once again, and Methuselah got one more chance to come back, so long as his leg stays on. Certain birds screeched “Nevermore” at unfair times, some say. A kamikaze missile was accused of driving drunk. Both hands are moving. Baldie fumbled. The Edge is sharper. Goldtooth got the finger. A man who carries your luggage did well, this time.

Mid-Week Super-Cryptic NFL Wrapup

This week in the NFL, a man broke his back but now will be okay due to icewater in his veins. A man pointed a video camera at the Jets, and a quarterback did what we remember him doing when he was on other teams. Someone caught a deflected bomb. Also, a kicker hustled in the mountains. On one team a hyperactive man tore his triceps and tried to talk his triceps out of being torn. On the opposing team there was a joke gone wrong.  Someone took his pants off.

In a game far to the west, no one was very good, and all throughout the league, tall receivers caught lots of touchdowns. Someone, while running, gave someone the upside-down finger. In a tower somewhere a Fox man turned off a game with three plays left to show cheerleaders. Someone who always gets hurt got hurt again, then wept. A thin running back was better than a fat running back. A superstar running back was bad, and another superstar running back was bad.  A wideout tried to date-rape himself.

Someone who used to be fast and good became fast and good once again, and a quarterback showed himself to be robotic.  A giant hurt his toe.  Another giant ran yards and yards with the ball in his paws.  Two men wore dark suits.  The kicker's hip recovered.  One team got one-tenth of the way.  One man tied another man.  Someone muffed.  There was a moment of silence.  A man whose last name is a spicy food did very well.